The Beast’s Tip of the Week – Vaseline

Why can’t a grown man buy Vaseline without someone sniggering? A little pot of Vaseline can be used for many things while you’re out and about, so here are a few ideas.

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1 – Chafing – Whether you’re running or walking, a bit of lubrication never goes amiss. If you don’t know what jogger’s nipple is, be thankful. If you already do, then you probably already know.

2 – Dried lips and hands – especially in Winter. It can also prevent heat loss from evaporation from the face in severely cold conditions.

3 – I am a Fire Starter… The clue is in the name. Petroleum. Add it to some cotton balls for a foolproof fire starter. They’ll burn well for a few minutes, and if prepared before hand are even waterproof.

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4 – The fourth and final use for Vaseline we haven’t tried ourselves, preferring the Sphagnum Moss Method of emergency arse wiping. However, there’s a school of thought that suggests a quick coating of Vaseline before the dreadful deed will ensure everything goes smoothly and no further intervention will be required. However, the idea of walking around with Vaseline smeared buttocks does not appeal…

Of course, there are many other uses. Any outdoorsy ones we’ve missed? Keep it clean!

The Beast

The Beast is our Igor. The Beast sets up our pages and makes us strong coffee. On good days The Beast gives an awesome foot massage. The Beast is not to be trifled with. The Beast will moderate without moderation or discrimination; but with deliberation! You have been warned...

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