Hill Walking A – Z Part 1
By Dave Roberts
on November 29, 2013 No ratings yet.
Posted in Outdoor Articles, Walkingbizzare, humour
Hill Walking A – Z Part 1
Here’s part 1 of our A-Z of hill walking, with a distinctly Snowdonian feel.
A – is for Aglet. Whether you’ve heard of them before, you’ve probably got one, or probably as many as four at once, but probably lost a few on your travels. I’ve lost mine and now my ends dangle on the floor and get all fuzzy and heavy when I’m walking through snow.
B – Has to be BEER. Despite science’s best efforts to produce a better recovery drink, Beer remains the one and only fluid suitable for replenishing the body and soul after a day on the hill. Not any old beer mind you, it has to be quality beer you can chew. Shandy on the other hand, is ideal as a mid-day drink on a ramble as a hydrating drink.
Ok – I know it’s a pint of Cider, but we had a much better ‘C’ than cider and I can’t drink beer any more – so please don’t rub it in!
C – Is for Cantilever. That precariously balanced slab of rock on Glyder Fach that countless rambling clubs, school parties and university climbing societies have attempted to topple. Along with “Adam and Eve” and “git who walked in front of my camera on Snowdon” this is third in the trinity of essential cheesy snaps for any walking holidaymaker to Snowdonia.
D is for Decompose. This is what banana skins do not readily do on the hill! If it’s not a hastily and poorly hidden turd on the Miner’s Path left by some three peaker, then this is probably the most common human pollutant on the hill. I can almost understand the throwing of apple cores, something might well eat them. But the banana skin is well known as having very few natural predators. In fact, the only known predator are curious students who have heard and given traction to the rumour that they can smoke banana skins. As bananas, and the skins that enclose them are readily found in their environment, they are NOT likely to travel up Elidir Fawr to forage for skins. So please, even if you sincerely think you’re doing them a favour by leaving them on the hill, you’re not.
We didn’t have a picture of banana skins, so here are some other items that don’t decompose on the hill.
E is for Eryri. The welsh name for North Snowdonia, though used out of convenience to cover the entire national park.
F is for False Summit. Or Another F**** False Summit as it is more commonly known. These are the bane of the hill walker. Even previously well known hills, especially in mist, can suddenly turn traitor and keep you thinking you’re there…. but you’re not…. even…….close….
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